Essence
When John mows the lawn he emits an odor like none other — a mix of gasoline, grass, mildew and sweat. He has special tennis shoes just for mowing. We don’t have a huge yard, so I wonder why this activity creates the worse stench of his week.
John was away last week, but his stench lived on. I forgot to take a laundry basket upstairs and I carried a full load down in my arms. Since I didn’t want to leave a trail of dirty socks and boxer shorts, I hugged the pile close to my chest. “Ewww, gross,” I thought as I made my way down stairs. There was no mistaking the smell. My nose was inches away from John’s lawn-mowing shirt. I hadn’t seen him in three days, but I felt his essence immediately.
When we love someone unconditionally we accept their stench. John’s flaws are apart of him. Earlier in marriage I thought I could freshen up the smelly parts. Then when I had children I thought their odors were mine to eliminate. Merritt’s head stinks because she gets food stuck in her hair and I don’t wash it everyday. Having a floppy head with dirty hair is part of her stinky disease. I’ve learned to embrace it. But I stink too. None of us is immune to crud. Our internal issues or our external smells are not easily washed.
But with my wrinkles, comes a bit of knowledge. I must embrace the essence of those I love — stink and all. So I try to excuse the flaws of my family, knowing that they probably don’t always like my smell.
5 Responses to “Essence”
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April 23rd, 2007 at 9:54 pm
That is a good clean smell–just like the barn is to many. Very good point though. We learn to love unconditionally and the rewards far outweigh the inconvenience. (Has John read this one?)
April 24th, 2007 at 8:59 am
Great post, Kathy! I have my grandfather’s scarf from many years ago, he died in the 80s. I don’t use the scarf, nor have I ever washed it because, you guessed it, it smells like him — his aftershave and his essence. And every time I smell it, it brings back warm memories.
I haven’t dug that scarf out of the drawer in awhile. Maybe I should do that today!
April 24th, 2007 at 9:51 am
Hi Kathy,
LOVE your site! And I’m so glad you’ve found my “Embedded in the ‘Burbs” blog at iVillage.com. Thanks for posting; I am looking forward to more of your really right on future comments.
Please come back and visit soon! Laurie Y.
PS Feel free to link to “Embedded” on your blogroll!
April 24th, 2007 at 4:50 pm
Hi!
I’m tagging you with a Thinking Blogger Award!
Check out today’s post on my blog for more details and to see my list.
AWARD DETAILS: Congratulations, you won a Thinking Blogger award!
Should you choose to participate, please make sure you pass this list of rules to the blogs you are tagging.
The participation rules are simple:
1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think,
2. Link to this post (http://www.thethinkingblog.com/2007/02/thinking-blogger-awards_11.html) so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,
3. Optional: Proudly display the ‘Thinking Blogger Award’ with a link to the post that you wrote. That was that! Please, remember to tag blogs with real merits, i.e. relative content, and above all - blogs that really get you thinking!
Amy
Tiny Blessings
http://amy-tinyblessings.blogspot.com
January 25th, 2010 at 3:30 am
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