wedded bliss
It isn’t my anniversary and John and I aren’t fighting, but I felt compelled to blog about marriage. We’re helping my Aunt and Uncle celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary this weekend. It will be a big hoopla with over 200 people and fancy, so I got a new outfit and even new shoes. And that’s okay, because heck, if anyone makes it to 50 years with one spouse there should be hoopla and polished toes.
Yet another adornment in my laundry room is this plaque that I picked up for fifty cents at an estate sale. “Don’t question your wife’s judgment, look who she married.” With sage advice like that, maybe the couple whose house was being liquidated, celebrated 50 years together too. But like every couple we all question and doubt and disagree. I used to think there were perfect couples. Perfect isn’t a word for earth and hardly one for our flawed relationships. But there are hikes in the Rockies, and holding hands on the beach, and crying with agony, and making up after fights, which make some moments in marriage feel almost perfect.
At Starbucks yesterday I ran into a man I’d become friendly with, just because he’s there everyday at the same time as me. Auggie is over 80 and has seen all the joy and tragedy of a full life. As we caught up and I asked how his whole crew of children and grandchildren and even great grandchildren were, he said, “Well, it’s not like the movies.” No we never get what we think may be perfect in our relationships. If we don’t judge but rather rejoice in the gift of our spouse we can experience more of those nearly flawless moments.
Now I have to go yell at my husband to get his bag packed! Life is good…not perfect.
6 Responses to “wedded bliss”
June 29th, 2007 at 3:29 pm
Your most recent blog on marriage reminded me of a quote I once heard which was attributed to Ruth Graham who just recently passed away. When she expressed concern to one of her mother’s friends that she and her future husband (Billy Graham) had some differences in their backgrounds, the very wise lady replied “if two people think exactly the same, one of them is unecessary.” Thank God for the differences!
June 30th, 2007 at 9:05 am
What I think is awesome is how this wise man answered your question. How true that life is not like the movies, or a book, or a song, it’s so much harder but more beautiful. Because, of course, it’s the tradgedy’s and triumps that make it so!
Great post!
June 30th, 2007 at 11:09 pm
I loved this post … and how true it is! I always liked that saying on the plaque you have too…how wise!
To answer your question on how Kayla did having to go back in her car seat she was actually perfectly fine! She couldn’t wait to get in her seat which really surprised me! I was expecting the complete opposite reaction after being on the road for so long!
July 2nd, 2007 at 7:46 pm
Dear Kathy, Yes! I feel 50 years of happiness and joy should be celebrated and we were so happy that you and John took the time and trouble and effort to come and help celebrate with us and the whole family. It meant so much to us to have you there.
July 3rd, 2007 at 10:44 pm
Very, very true! I wish I knew where I could get a plaque like that for my own laundry room!
Happy 4th!
Jane, P&B Girls
July 5th, 2007 at 10:04 am
Wise words! And that plaque is terrific. Thanks for sharing this with us. It’s so easy to look at the veneer of other people’s lives and think, “They’ve got a perfect marriage, family, job, whatever.” But we’re all human beings, and none of us is living in the movies.